How to Communicate With Your Woman
By David Carter
It’s important to learn how to communicate with your woman because in most cases it’s going to be the quality of your communication that determines the quality of your relationship.
And to best accomplish this, it’s important that we observe how to communicate in a relationship with the woman we love and adore as real MEN.
I’m going to provide several techniques for you to use as you communicate with your woman. They’ll not only help you to enhance the quality of your relationship, but they’ll also make your wife or girlfriend desire you more as she sees you as the one man she can place her full trust and confidence in.
1. Be Honest and Compassionate
Nothing will turn your woman off (or set her off) more than signs of dishonesty as you communicate with her. Be sincere and firm with her always, but do so compassionately.
Be confident in your communication, but be considerate as well. This is a fine art that few men ever really learn.
You don’t have to apologize for how you feel. Have an opinion and stand by it if it aligns with your values and principles as a man. But do so in a loving way that communicates your ability to restrain your masculine power for her benefit.
This is what is called being honest with yourself. If there’s something that you stand for and you feel that it’s being violated, ensure that your woman understands how you feel.
For instance, I don’t tolerate foul language, temper tantrums, belittling, or name calling when I communicate with my girlfriend. I just don’t! She knows it and I know it, so whenever a dispute or disagreement arises it’s never an issue. I’m honest in what I stand for and I’m honest in how I relate to her problems and issues.
This sort of stance will not only help your wife or girlfriend to sort through her emotions much better, but it will also earn her respect simply because she knows that she can rely on you to be reasonable when she’s not at her best.
2. Don’t Get Emotional
This might be a tough one for some guys, but it’s important that you learn how to control your emotions when communicating with your wife or girlfriend, especially if she’s having an issue with you in particular.
First of all, keeping your emotions out of the picture will free you from trying to “come to her rescue” if she’s facing an issue that’s unrelated to you. It will keep you from trying to find a solution for her so that you can fix her problem and move on.
Secondly, keeping your emotions out of the picture will free you from all forms of pettiness if the issue she’s facing has more to do with you. The more detached you can become the better you can address the issue at hand.
Now, I’m not saying to avoid being emotionally involved. All I’m saying is to THINK about what you’re saying and how you’d like to communicate. Don’t allow her emotions to sweep over you and cause you to lose sight of the real problem.
Be reasonable. Be the rock. Be the man.
3. Observe Body Language
In learning how to communicate with your woman your body language, as well as that of your wife or girlfriend, will tell you a great deal about what’s really going on. It’s almost as if we can subconsciously tell how someone is feeling about something based on the movement of their eyes, their hands, and even the posture of their body.
So if you want to learn how to communicate more effectively with your woman, begin to notice her body language when she’s speaking to you and take it into consideration as she speaks her mind.
The same applies for you as well.
Don’t allow your body language to be completely reactionary to what she’s saying especially if the issue at hand is you.
Keep a steady stance and a calm but firm tone in your voice while sitting next to her as she speaks. And always maintain as much eye contact as possible.
Remember to keep in mind what her body (as well as yours) is communicating:
- Having her arms folded in front of her may mean that she’s feeling defensive and perhaps closed off. It’s not very welcoming.
- If she doesn’t want to make eye contact with you then she’s either not be interested in what you’re saying, ashamed of something, or slightly uncomfortable expressing her feelings.
- Rolling of eyes usually signifies disbelief and sarcasm.
- And if she’s not facing you while she’s talking, she could either be disinterested or simply closed off.
4. Nurture the Healing Process
Everyone has insecurities, and at the heart of EVERY emotional issue is a deep rooted insecurity that we’re usually not aware of. And after you’ve listened to your woman express her feelings and sort through her emotions, your final duty will be to help her through the healing process.
No, you’re not trying to “fix” her or her problem and you’re not trying to play Dr. Phil. All you’re doing is giving her the support and encouragement that she needs from you, whether you’re the problem or not.
If you’ve really listened and paid special attention to what she’s been saying, chances are you might have uncovered the real issue at hand. And I guarantee you that the more emotional she is about it, the deeper her insecurities are.
Knowing what to say to her at the right time will rarely come early on in the conversation. It will require some work and attentiveness on your part, but if you can hone in on the root of the issue, you can address it (much later in the conversation) in a way that helps her to grow.
So no matter what the issue may be, if you can help her to get through her healing process she’ll grow to become more and more appreciative of you.
Your ability to communicate and nourish her emotions on this level will be an invaluable skill in your relationship. And as you learn how to communicate with your woman you won’t ever have to worry about her looking elsewhere to gain the emotional support that she requires from a man.
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